Is your one and only child, who has been by your side for a few years and never far away unless you wanted, about to start their educational life with the arrival of September?
Changes in life can excite a person, regardless of age. To manage this excitement, both parents and children starting school need some guidance to help them adapt to this big and long-term change in their lives.
Suggestions for the Period Just Before Starting School:
It will be helpful to inform your child about this new situation. People tend to worry less when they have an idea of how exciting situations will unfold. Explain to your child why they need to go to school and the benefits it will bring them. However, while doing this, make sure to be realistic, because school is not only a place for fun and play.
Before school starts, visiting the school together with your child and introducing them to the teacher might be the first step in helping them visualize and adjust to the new environment.
When shopping for school supplies, having your child accompany you and choose items they like can be beneficial. Stationery often excites children.
If you have a habit of telling bedtime stories, you can start using children's storybooks that focus on the theme of "starting school" as the school time approaches.
By learning your child’s thoughts and concerns about school, you can address any questions or worries they may have (e.g., bathrooms, where they will eat, etc.).
You can share your own school memories, but it’s better to do so for fun, rather than as a lesson.
Don't engage in school-related activities (e.g., telling school stories, sharing your own memories, etc.) too often or abruptly, as it might create a negative perception in your child and increase their anxiety. The goal should be to motivate them.
Let your child know that even if you're not there when school starts, they will be safe, which can help alleviate some of their concerns.
Make sure to remain calm yourself, and if you feel anxious, do not let it show to your child, as they will take comfort in your security.
Suggestions for the First Day of School:
Going to school together with your child on the first day will make the adaptation process easier.
It’s important for your child to meet the teacher while you are there.
Avoid entering the classroom with your child. After showing them their class, teacher, and necessary areas in the school, avoid lingering too long.
Do not give the impression that you are saying goodbye when your child enters the classroom. Instead of saying, "Let me give you one last kiss," or "Let me hug you once more before you go," say something like "Alright, the class is starting now!"
Remember that your child won’t try to adjust as long as you are with them.
If you see your child anxious or crying, do not compare them with other calm children. Avoid saying things like "Look, they’re not crying."
Tell your child that feeling nervous is normal, and new experiences can cause anxiety, but it will pass in a few days.
Make sure to tell your child that you will pick them up on time after school.
Being there on time at the end of school is important; otherwise, your child’s trust may be shaken.
If they will be using the school bus, make sure to be there on time and introduce your child to the bus driver. Confirm that your child knows the bus number or license plate. Even if you are there, having them return home by bus will make the adaptation easier.
When your child comes home, ask them about how their first day went and listen carefully to their thoughts and feelings.
Helping your child pack their school bag and clothes for the next day will increase their motivation.
What is Play Therapy?
Play therapy is like counseling for adults, but for children. When adults face problems, sharing them with a trusted friend or therapist helps them. Children, however, have difficulty expressing themselves with words the way adults do. That’s why it’s hard for them to put into words what troubles them. Play therapy gives children a chance to communicate their thoughts, feelings, needs, and desires through play, their most natural form of expression. With a trained Play Therapist, children learn to understand themselves and the world around them better, work on solving problems, and develop skills to cope with life’s challenges.
Why Does My Child Need Play Therapy?
At some point during their growth process, many children may have difficulty dealing with life experiences or may display behaviors that concern parents or teachers. If you, your child’s teacher, or doctor are worried about your child’s behavior or notice they are struggling to cope, it is advisable to consult an expert; the recommended approach is usually play therapy.
What Can I Expect from Play Therapy?
Play therapy is a process in which the therapist builds a trusting relationship with the child, identifies and works on the child's problems, finds solutions, practices new skills, and prepares for closure. Changes in mood and behavior during play therapy are normal and expected. Sometimes, things may seem to get worse before they improve. This is a normal part of the process, and if you notice it, discuss it with your child’s therapist.
The therapist will also avoid pushing the child to disclose information about their life or traumatic experiences. The child will be allowed to process problems at their own pace. In the therapy room, the child will have more freedom than they usually experience in other parts of their life.
How Should I Talk to My Child After Therapy?
It’s important that your child does not feel pressured to share everything that happened during play therapy. The therapy session should be considered as a special time between the child and the therapist. Allow your child to start a conversation about their therapy if they wish, but also give them the freedom not to talk if they don’t want to.
How Often and How Long Should My Child Attend Play Therapy?
Each child progresses at a different pace in therapy. Therefore, the duration of therapy depends on the child’s personality, the severity of the trauma, and the family and life circumstances. Children develop better with structure and consistency, so regular therapy sessions are crucial for maximum benefit.
What Should I Expect After Therapy Ends?
During therapy, the therapist will notice when your child no longer needs therapeutic intervention. When your child’s play and behavior become more appropriate to their age and development, it is time for them to graduate from therapy.
When Should I Talk to the Therapist?
Your child’s therapist will likely want to meet with you regularly to discuss progress. If there is any concern or change in your child’s behavior, you can also request an individual meeting with the therapist at any time.
These are some key aspects and guidelines to follow when helping your child through this exciting yet challenging time.
